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On Sadness

July 1, 2011

:*(

I’ve had some unhappiness in my life this week.  I found out that my love has been having some desires for someone else.  It’s not as serious as it could be – she’s not left me – but the fact that her heart yearns for another’s breaks mine.

We’re in a difficult place right now and I’m not sure how to proceed.  I still love her but I’m feeling many conflicting emotions, including hurt, anger, and desire.

In other news, I have two more WoW-related posts which I’ll have ready very soon.  I intended to do a follow-up to my previous jewelcrafting post after 4.1 hit, but after vendor prices for cut gems were reduced I lost the desire to invest the time it would take to play the AH.  The jewelcrafting market on my server is dominated by a certain individual who logs in much more regularly than I can.  In addition to the time investment, I would have to have a very cheap source of uncut gems for it to cover all the reposting fees.  So I’ve not kept up on how ore prices have changed or what’s the most profitable way to use jewelcrafting since 4.1.  Maybe I’ll get back to it at some point, but currently it’s not a very high priority.  Call me an opportunist if you want, I call it smart!

It’s also been a while since I’ve shared some music so I thought I’d do that here as well.  Below are two songs by Antonín Dvořák (1841-1904), the preeminent Czech composer.  Both first appeared in his early song collection Cypřiše (Cypresses) but were later reworked and republished in his Op. 2 Ctvero písní (Four Songs) of 1882.  The translations included below are courtesy of the Lied and Artsong Texts Page.  I have better translations but they’re in a box on the other side of the country right now, so these will have to suffice.  Both songs have texts by Gustav Pfleger-Moravský (1833-1875), a poet which I admit I don’t know much about.

I absolutely love these songs – I hope you enjoy them also.  Their texts seem appropriate for how I’m feeling today.

Mé srdce často v bolesti (Op. 2, No. 3)

Mé srdce často v bolesti
Se teskně zadumá,
Ó, že ta láska trnů
A bolestí tolik má.

Ta láska přejde jako sen,
tak krásná, spanilá
A za kratinko upne jen
Se na ní mohyla.

A na mohylu kámen dán,
Nad nímž tam lípa bdí
A na kameni nápis psán:
Zde srdce zvadlé spí
Zde puklé srdce spí!

English translation:

My heart is often in pain
feeling depressed,
Oh, love involves so many thorns
and agonies.

Love passes like a dream,
so lovely and graceful,
but in a moment all
that is left of it is a grave.

And a stone is placed on the grave,
over which a linden tree keeps watch
and there is an inscription on the stone:
“Here rests a heart that has withered,
Here rests a broken heart.”

O byl to krásný, zlatý (Op. 2, No. 2)

O byl to krásný, zlatý sen,
Jejž spolu jsme tam snili!
Ach, škoda, že tak krátký jen,
Byl sen ten přespanilý.

Tak sladká touha v bytosti
Se celé uhostila
A při loučení žalosti
Se slza dostavila.

A často chodím na horu
A za tebou se dívám,
Však po dalekém obzoru
Jen žal svůj rozesílám!

English translation:

Oh, it was a beautiful golden dream
that we dreamt there together.
Oh what a shame that it was so short,
that wonderful dream.

Such a sweet longing
filled my whole being
and along with the sorrow of parting
a tear formed.

And I often go into the hills
and I look out for you,
although into the distant horizon
all that I send out is my sorrow.

-Liyly

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